UFBB Member Highlight: Cari Mueller on the Healing Power of Grief Recovery Written by Rosa Linda Fallon

Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist and member of Unstoppable French Broads Brunch (USFBB) Cari Mueller understands the challenges of unresolved grief, having endured tremendous pain and loss throughout her own life. Mueller experienced numerous traumatic events including divorce, the loss of four pregnancies, sexual abuse in the military, and childhood attachment patterns, which all led to experiencing less than favorable relationships throughout her adult life. 

After retiring from the army, Mueller engaged in her own self-healing work, but couldn’t help but notice there was something missing in her approach. She knew she was grieving from the losses she had experienced, kickstarting her on the path of investigating grief. Not only did she discover grief recovery had been the missing puzzle piece all along, she also realized she wanted to help others through this process, too. “I had bought The Grief Recovery Handbook, and it sat on the shelf for a while until I was ready to investigate it,” Mueller recalls. “When I did, I went straight for the certification process because I knew I was going to do the work and help others do the same.”

Mueller utilizes the Grief Recovery Method ®, a process that helps a person complete their relationship with the pain, isolation, and loneliness caused by significant loss. She supports people through this process as they share their unresolved grief, which can center around things they wish they would’ve said or done differently, as well as unrealized hopes, dreams, and expectations that come to the surface. Mueller recognizes that many may not be familiar with grief recovery, yet she says it is important self-work everyone should consider, especially those who may be struggling on a deeper level.  

“Once I walked all the way through the process, I understood exactly how powerful and important this work is for every person to have access to,” Mueller says, referring to her own healing experience through the Grief Recovery Method ®. “I felt gratitude and relief once I changed my relationship with my grief. I want everyone to have the same opportunity.” 

Mueller believes taking care of one’s mental wellness is a priority. She points out that some may not even be aware they are struggling with mental wellness issues. “I would suggest that someone be willing to consider they might be struggling because not everyone is aware that they are,” Mueller says, referring to her own experience of not immediately recognizing her own struggles. “I just thought this is how my life is because I did not know any differently. No one ever spoke to me about stress, childhood trauma and attachment issues, generational trauma, or anything of this nature,” she continues, “I had to slow down to investigate my life, circumstances, and relationship patterns in order to understand that there is something going on that I have the ability to heal.”

Mueller says she is passionate about helping others through this process, and sharing her own experience, education and tools with others so that they can heal, too. She says she is excited to move forward through her healing journey as she assists those who are also struggling. “I am excited about peeling back the layers of my life and sitting with different parts of myself that I have been disconnected from,” she says. “I look forward to what I am becoming as I am reunited with these parts of myself and we heal together.” 

Through her work, Mueller offers one-on-one and group support by providing a safe space for people to share unspoken feelings and thoughts centered around grief. “Grief recovery is achieved by a series of small intentional steps taken by the griever,” she says. “And I will walk out those steps with every person.”

For more information visit www.beacons.ai/supporthuman_kind 

Bio: 

Cari Mueller is an army veteran with 26 years of honorable service. After retiring in 2015, she graduated from massage therapy school, worked as a program specialist at the Cindy Platt Boys and Girls Club, and earned her degree in human services. She now practices as a North Carolina Certified Peer Support Specialist, Recovery Coach, and Advanced Certified Grief Recovery Method Specialist. When Mueller is not helping others process unresolved grief, you can find her hiking to waterfalls or networking at the monthly Unstoppable French Broads Brunch led by Asheville resident Sarah Malson.

Photo Credit: Ivana Desancic Photography